Kimberly Dyan Moore believes in tapping into your creative energy and letting your inner child out to play, not just because she wants out (because she does!) but also because creativity relieves stress by helping us be fully present in the moment. We explore the nuances of burnout versus stress and how it is showing up in the women of Generation X.
Kimberly Dyan Moore helps GenX women rebel against the expectations of others and rediscover who they are, so they can live life on their terms. As a former teacher, she uses her love of art and helping others as a life coach to help resolve burnout, transform stress and feel free to live a life they love.
In this episode we discuss:
Connect with Kimberly through her website (http://www.genxcreative.com) or Facebook group (http://facebook.com/groups/genxwomenwarriors)
And get perspective on your current stress level with Kimberly’s guide, “From Burnout to Bliss: Reclaim your Joy Today“ (https://gum.co/jufsE)
Welcome back. I am so happy you are here with me this week to join my conversation with my fabulous friend, Kimberly. Kimberly Dyan is a former teacher who uses who uses her love of art and helping others as a life coach. In her current iteration, she helps Gen X women rebel against the expectations of others and rediscover who they are. So they can live life on their terms and feel free. She believes in tapping into your creative energy and letting your inner child out to play, because she wants out. trust her on this. Kimberly, thank you for joining me lovely.
Thank you for having me, Susi, I'm so excited to be here today.
So now I have two questions to start us off. But first, let's start at the very beginning. Very good place to start. So tell us how you came to this space from being a teacher? What called you into coaching and working with women who are Gen X, which is right, where we land in the generation spectrum?
Yes, it is right where we are. So I was a teacher for 16 years. And along the way, I developed heart disease. And then I had another scare and I was I kind of realized life is really short. And teaching wasn't like it was when I started. There's a lot of bureaucracy, a lot of other things. So although I enjoyed the the students, I didn't feel like I was making the impact I could. And there was just a lot of stress, which wasn't good for my health, or my mindset. And so I decided I wanted to be able to make an impact. That's what I'm on this earth to do is make an impact. So why don't I go help women who are my age, even if they don't have a health problem? Who are maybe staying in something, because that's what they've always done? Because that's why I stayed way longer probably than I would have if you know I had, you know, thought about it sooner, and help them get out there and live their purpose. Do what brings them joy
Joy's Well, it should be what makes the world go round money can just take a backseat. And so I agree with you and I share notes often on this interesting phenomenon that Generation X kind of seems to be totally forgotten. Like, I guess we weren't loud enough. We didn't take up enough space, but my little elbows out. So so so help us like fill in the gaps where where do we land? And why do you think folks just tend to not not be paying too much attention to us?
So we've been called the jam Brady generation. And I kind of like that said, Oh, I think it's kind of nice. So we're wedged between two huge generations for some reason, and I'm not a sociologist, and I don't study all that for a living. But I've done a lot of reading. For some reason. We're only a 15 year generation, the baby boomers are huge. They're a huge generation. I think 45 to 64, I think. And then the millennials were after us and they're like 1982, I think up to 2000. I think no one like if I get this wrong by Don't get in my inbox about it. So this generation January's difference,
according to different sources, like those numbers fluctuate.
So I try to look at the like the sociologists and the different, like the people who have been studying the trends, that's where I try to get, so Generation X is pretty much 1965 to 1980. So it's 15 years. So it's a small generation. And the two generations were sandwiched between are both very loud generations. And Generation X is over here like Yeah, yeah, whatever. Yeah.
I think I like that too. Whatever.
Yeah. But we grew up this illusion to everything anyway, like, we were just like, Okay, this is how things are, whatever. And we just did our thing, you know. And so then the millennials came along, and they're not a quiet generation. And I've done a lot of reading on the generations in the workplace. And just to summarize, like, the baby boomers are cute because they're trying to figure out the technology. Right? And then the millennials are very loud about their demands, and they want the foosball tables and they want this and all these things to be there. nginx is in there just with a strong work ethic. Like even though we were not a slacker When we're younger, we grew up this work ethic. But we're passed over for promotions because we're not loud. We go in and we do our job with a very strong work ethic, and then we go home. But we're not getting promoted. And this is just like a summary of some research for it.
Right? Exactly. And you know, bring it in the comments, let us know if you feel this is true or not. Or maybe you are we affectionately dubbed them Zoomers, you're a boomer that's a little closer to the Gen X vibe. And certainly there's some overlap with the millennials. Because these, these kind of definitions or delineations are perhaps arbitrary, but sociologists do what they do and they get to put these things on paper and call back to that. But I agree to your point, you know, we kind of got tagged this, you know, like whatever kind of a vibe, we kind of sat back and watch what was happening. We watched a lot of TV, we were the latchkey kids, I don't think millennials were really allowed to, you know, walk themselves or bus home and then self monitor until the parents got home from work. I think that was already maybe more frowned upon. They had to bridge though
they want free range. We were free range. They were less free range. Yes.
Exactly. And, and it has a really big impact. We saw our own influences. A lot of it was media because cable TV became a thing MTV was born, the computer wasn't born. But it certainly that's the first time it showed up in our homes, right? So So and we're not really digital natives. But we learned technology, we learned how to put it to work for us. Whereas the next in line, always had it and more in the current iteration, we saw a lot more, we lived through a lot more of the evolution of home computers and what they could be used for.
Right? I never thought I'd have a computer in my pocket. Like, we couldn't even imagine that I'd be able to do something and not go to the library and look at the car catalog or get an encyclopedia like we never thought that we'd be able to do that. Right?
When I was in college, and moved off campus, I lived in a house with six other people. And we had one computer that we shared amongst all of us because it was only ever used for writing papers. And notes were like taking some notes written on note cards. We've got a long way, baby.
Ah, yeah, I feel it because I'm like, Yeah, I didn't have Google when I was in high school in the beginning to college like we were. We were figuring it out. I think I had the CD, the Encarta CD that was like the encyclopedia. I don't know if you remember that. So I had one of those, but nothing like that is like instantly it updates with new stuff like you do you know, you can go to Encyclopedia Britannica, and if something happened, they've already updated it. Online. Yeah. So very different.
Yes, yes, we have indeed come a long way. And I think, you know, in our generation, a lot of the boomers got into positions that were solid, with companies that took care of them and got into a tenure track isn't the right word, unless they were teachers, but got themselves lined up for pensions, right, those investments added up and they had the time to accumulate whereas I believe we ingenix may have started this trend of more short lived for rears really following or being called to do different things that serve us, when possible, right fight, trying out different things. But then with age and families coming along and responsibility, you know, that flexibility was more limited. And now we're in the sandwich generation spot as our parents are aging and starting to need a little bit more support. The kids may be growing up and moving out of the house. I know your son's about to head off to college. So that's a super big shift.
Yes, empty nest time. Yes. And that's actually something I work with clients on too is like, when you've been just someone's mom for 18 years, and now you're gonna be yourself again. And it's like, oh, what do I do now? I gotta find a hobby. You know, it's just something so it's good that I have my hobbies. Like, I've already established that but not everyone has done that. So I also think it's, I just want to point out though, like, I just read the baby boomers are like they all have all this retirement and all this but genetics hasn't like they're not. They're not very wealthy, like not saying I'm not saying there aren't wealthy Gen X people, but they're just they don't have all the pensions and all the things and then the baby boomers are going to leave money to their millennial children that then some of the It Gets so weird. Some of the Gen Xers have baby boomer parents, but some of us have sound generation parents might As a silent generation, and so my mom's a baby boomer, so it's just weird to see how all this works out. And there are trends and not everything's the same for everybody. But it's interesting to see like, this is how things kind of, like we can relate to each other based on, like, because of when we were born, I don't know, it's interesting to me, it really
is because, um, you know, they're just themes or trends. And to your point, I know so many people. And it was one of the things that drove me to leave the work that I was doing, make a total pivot and get into holistic health and start talking about stress, because I saw what happened to people who were aging out of their homes, losing their independence because of health issues and didn't have resources available who had limited retirement, or financial stability. And I agree with you, I think that that kind of opportunity or that flexibility that we had or maybe being authentic, right, we weren't going to give one to the man I always think of this line in a john Cusack movie where he tells his girlfriend, his perspective, girlfriend's father, right, all the ways in which he doesn't want to buy into capitalism. He doesn't want to sell anything bought or sold, right, you can find a clip and link it. It's a great rant. And I think that, you know, it's, I love that we've taken that step to follow our hearts. And we've got to take care of ourselves as well, right? our well being our peace of mind, as well as that, what we're getting in the moment. So who lots of tirades, thanks for indulging me in that little.
I need to add one thing. So what I'm seeing though, like, in our generation, there's some of us that are doing what you and I had done. And there's some people who were like, no, my degrees in X, I've been at x job for 15 years, 20 years, and I'm just gonna do it. Even though I don't like it. I'm miserable. I don't like it. But I'm just gonna keep doing it. So that's what I got a degree in. And because I hear that from my parents, you should be teaching you got a degree in teaching. Well, you know what, no, because that's not what I should be doing. Because obviously, I'm healthier and happier now doing what I'm doing. But there is that old school mind, but there's some people in our generation that are like, No, I'm just gonna stay in this box because this box is safe. This is what I've always known. This is, you know, stable to me, but it makes me unhappy. So it's like, how do you want to spend and we're we're called midlife now even though I feel like I'm just getting started. I don't like to use midlife. But Jeanette says in midlife, why would you spend the rest of your days miserable? So that's where I'm coming from?
Yes, absolutely. And that I agree. 100% I think a lot of people, whether it's a career that doesn't serve us anymore, or work that we don't find inspiring, but we tell ourselves, well, I'll just work until I get this promotion, or I'll work until this date on the calendar, and then I'll make it my turn, then I'll find out what I want to do next, then I'll do something that lights me up, then I'll pay more attention to my health, my happiness, and what have you, right, so we really get kind of focused on what's in front of us right now and lose that perspective of where we are driving ourselves to, with this, this focus on All right, I'm not loving it, but it's safe, it's secure. It's whatever, right? Not much longer. I'll just punch in, punch out.
So you never know like, that's what I found out with my heart condition. You never know. What's gonna happen. My thing I used to say, I used to say to people, my biggest fear is that I'm going to pass and people are gonna say I was a sellout. Because I gave in to capitalism, or I gave in and that's just how I you know, I didn't want to be a sellout. And people like, Oh, you shouldn't worry what others think. Yeah, but I didn't wanna be a sellout. Hello, Gen X. I want to be so out. I was,
again, reflective of the people in our generation, talking about my generation. Yeah, truly. And so I think I'm at a point, we need a cheerleader. We need someone to reflect back these things that we're saying that we don't hear. Waking up on Monday wish and it was Friday, we're wishing away five days of the week. How long do we think that's going to hold up? So in your work as a coach and as a guide to help people reconnect with their passion, light themselves back up again? At what point do you find people kind of what's what's the last straw or what helps them take back permission to say it's time for me, it's time for me to come first. Or at least figure out where that went and what she might like. To do
well, for me, they're already in burnout, which they're already overwhelmed, exhausted. They they feel unmotivated, they feel helpless, like they've waited too long. Like they kept saying, Oh, I'm stressed, stress is normal. I'm supposed to feel this way. I'm not supposed to like work. That's another one from my parents. How do you just go
to work? You know? It's a four letter word.
Yeah. But I'm like, No, you should like what you do. But usually, like, they're just so dislike a shell of who they were, by the time they're like, Oh, I need to do something different, or they've had a health scare. Or, you know, they are like, Oh, my kids are out of the house. What am I gonna do myself, now it's time to do something for myself or, you know, something that, you know, to me, it's like, taking something monumental. And by the time I left, like, it was already three years after my last health scare, I was just like, I can't do this anymore. So when I was laying in the hospital, I'm like, Okay, I'm not gonna do this anymore. It was like, I tried to keep doing it. And I'm just like, what am I doing? And I wasn't present for my family. And I look at those three years, and I'm like, I was there, physically. But like, I wasn't there. And so I feel like they're the women who who need to come to me and who seek out this kind of help. They're like, just so just helpless and unmotivated. Because they're like, I can't get better. This is it. This sucks. This is what life is going to be. And they don't have to get to that point.
That's right. We don't have to get resigned, we don't have to. I mean, I think it comes from kind of putting ourselves last, when you've got a family to take care of, you know, that's first and foremost, right? You've got to do all of this never ending list plus work if you do both. And I think it's really nice to try not to curse. I don't, I don't know why I just want to be frank when I'm on the air with you. But I can't believe how society feels it's okay to judge women, and to judge working mothers in hand or to judge stay at home moms. In both aspects. People are getting it, you know, whether How could you leave your children and have a career outside their house? or How could you be defined simply by raising your family and it breaks my heart to see my friends in both sides of that conversation? Or in our, in our generation, and this will be interesting numbers to take a look at and to see how many of us didn't have our own children and raise a family because there's plenty of judgment that comes down on that to
you there is and I have several friends in our generation who decided not to have kids? And they always have to answer that question. And I don't even think anyone should ask, When are you having kids? Why aren't you having kids and being told, oh, you're gonna regret having kids, or not having kids you're gonna regret not having kids and, and I'm just like, motherhood doesn't have to define us because like I said, You're an empty nester, and then you're trying to figure out, Okay, I'm not, you know, Alex's mom anymore. I'm just not her. Who else am I? And that's why I'm like, I have hobbies, I take trips, like with girlfriends by myself, like I still do, like, I need to recharge my batteries, or I'm no good for him. And so and that's been, and I was a single mom, 14 years, just him and I when he was a toddler, you know, forward and even then, he'd stay with his grandma, and I'd get a weekend away because I was no good for him. If I didn't take care of me. And we women do give and give. And then there is that stigma. I even me going out of town with a toddler. Like without it. You know, I leave him and I go well, what do you do you left your Okay. Well, you know why? Because I'm tired.
I need to not be thinking about the sleep schedule and the food schedule and the activities in the you know, productive entertainment and the answering the endless questions, right, a two day retreat. Mom deserves it.
Yes, yes. And you know, what else is interesting about our generation and, and that, but I want to bring this back around. So there's a six part series that National Geographic did and it's called Generation X. And it's amazing. And it was I think I saw it originally on the National Geographics channel because we have cable, and I want to see where I could stream. I want to watch it again. But they talk about how some members of our generation and they didn't pick out which parts did like the free range parent parenting, where are our parents, we're going to go hang out with their friends. We were going to go along, maybe there'd be other kids there and if not, we'd better entertain ourselves and not follow the grownups, you know, and if there were other kids there, we just played with whoever was there. Probably running around outside doing whatever and that's how I grew up there was no organized playdates or anything and so then helicopter parenting parenting I'm having trouble that ordered a was born from some genetics or feeling like they were cheated out of a childhood so they overscheduled their children now I never overscheduled my son I told him we were on our and I'm like you need to learn entertain yourself um we got that right absolutely right Ella mom from his school but call and want to do a playdate? Sure I I do that. But it was just so like playdates it was just so weird. And then you'd be hanging out this mom that you didn't know. And, and maybe you were just different. I don't know. Anyway, so but that was like, I'm like, what was wrong with how we grew up. Like we had, we had better social skills, because we were forced into situations where people we didn't know, we had to play to entertain ourselves and not bother the senses, like, you know, so I suggest that documentary to everyone who's it explains genetics a lot. But, um, I forgot why I went off on that tangent, but it's, we take care of everybody, we do all these things. And a lot of it is we feel we have to and social media doesn't help. Among my friend group. I had Alex my son when I was 25. They waited later. And so then I see them on Facebook, having these pintrest birthday parties, like they're trying to outdo each other, like making all these things and I'm just like his first two birthday parties were just at my house with like, whatever, like and I just bought Party City like Elmo decorations one year and Blue's Clues. Like I wasn't trying to make all these favors to send home with everybody cuz like, you didn't remember that. And I could just see the competition. And like I said that, you know, they waited, but like, there's mom competition. It's like, why are you spending your time on mom competition and not taking care of yourself? Um,
there's a little something to sit with. Because I see that too. I see it. And when you know, then there's the party for every kid in the class. That's right. 25 gift bags to compare yourself to when it's your kids turn? Yeah. Yeah, it's tough. It's tough. And, and again, just like I, oh, gosh, I've just talked to too many people today. So I think I'm gonna refer to something that wasn't part of our conversation. And then I lost it. I chased it away. So apparently, it didn't need to be a part of ours. But I would, I think it's really interesting to see how these influences trickle down and show up. And definitely this whole Advent, right, we came of age. I mean, I think I joined Facebook, after college, maybe like five years after college. And I was working on my own, but I was moving around a lot working in theater, and it was a great way to stay in touch with people who I didn't see all the time anymore, right? It was a point of connection. It wasn't a point of comparison. And now, you know, when I hear people say, well, work life balance is a myth. Like, is that because you think it has to look like someone else's picture of it? Like, is it because you don't know how to define that for yourself? And this comparison game is gonna land and turn the tables on us? Like, no wonder people are kind of withholding judgment or looking over their shoulder like afraid to make a strong choice, because there's so much influence, assessment judgment, what have you, it's hard
to shrug that Right. Right. And I try to tell people, you know, what you see on social media isn't the whole picture. You're only seeing the good parts, you're not seeing the struggles, you're not seeing, you know, the bad things you're not, you know, all that it's not on there. So you can't compare your life you're not seeing what they're going through. So that's a whole nother story for a whole nother day. But, you know, instead of trying to compete with other moms on social media to make these pretty party favors, take care of yourself, or to have this elaborate, like, you know, my son just graduated high school and then I see these other moms with high school seniors and they're doing these elaborate, you know, we didn't do an elaborate party went to a restaurant with but you can have a party, but it was all this like fancy stuff. And I'm just like, I think that's more for your pictures than it is for your graduate, belly, whatever cookies you give them. Give them their, their their gift cards in their cache and let them go on their way they want to hang out with their friends. Think about we were teenagers one, right? Oh, so it's like, I think it's more for pictures. Some of the stuff I see. And I'm not bashing everybody who does. Sometimes I go my son said I'm extra which is the word that means you just do too much or whatever. He said you're extra but and so sometimes I am I think sometimes you need to put stuff in perspective.
Yes, perspective is powerful. And like I was saying earlier, it's really helpful to have somebody who can reflect back to you like, is this authentic? Is this aligned? Is this somebody else's importance, you know, landing on what you think you need to do for yourself or right, you need to put yourself after X, Y, and Z. Got
that? Yeah, we're gonna rebel against the expectations of others. It's only because of course, Gen X has been a rebel, but it's only your expectations that matter.
Right? We get to define that for ourselves. And so you said earlier to with burnout versus stress. So how do you delineate the difference there, because I think that's a pretty big gray area, and people will minimize burnout and maybe sometimes kind of blow stress out of proportion. Although I would say I don't think that's necessarily a bad thing we need to really be truthful about the stress that we're feeling.
Oh, of course. So stress, there is a difference between the two, stress is too much. And burnout is too little. And we need stress to function. Sometimes I procrastinate. Sometimes it's the stress that I put something off that gets it done, and it's done so beautifully. And I don't know why I do that to myself.
We write that paper overnight, and we hand it in.
And it's perfect. Like, oh, wow, I didn't think I wrote that great, but Okay, great. Um, so, there's some stress, we need to function. Okay, every day, we need it. We can't just go through life. But without any, would get less done. I think that's my opinion. But burnout is too little. So stress can lead to burnout. But it's not the same thing with burnout. When I say you have too little, you have no hope, no motivation, like, you're to the part where you're like, this is suck, this sucks, this is awful, it's never gonna get better. This is how it is it can lead to depression, it could lead to physical ailments. So that's the difference. It's not just extreme stress, it's when you've gotten to the point in your life where you lose hope. Because when you're stressed out, you're like, as soon as I finish this project, I'm not going to be stressed anymore. And that's usually the truth. Right and finished, whatever project it is, or whatever you're working on, no matter what your job is, or even if you're a stay at home mom, you're like, I'm gonna get through this laundry, and I'm gonna get it put away and this dress is gonna be gone. And that's usually true. The stress is relieved when the project is done. But with burnout, like you can't even believe that anything, any relief is coming.
Right? And and that's, that's my understanding, too, is the differences you can you can find relief from stress, whereas burnout just last that just lands on you, and it lasts. And it's hard to find your way out. And at that point, it certainly is hard to find the resources, you're looking for the help, which is why it's so important to to understand where our limits are to understand before we're in the thick of it, how we can support ourselves, and feel more restored and come back to balance. You know what that looks like what we're going to call in for ourselves when we need it, right? We need that emergency preparedness plan.
Right? That plan that is there for when we need it. And what I did, though, so I wrote this ebook, and I can send you the link, but it's a short ebook called, from burnout to bliss. reclaim your joy today. And it has a little quiz in it that I came up with called stress versus burnout. And you answer you rate, feelings and, and it gives you a score, and it shows you where you are. And then what you do is you flip to that section of the book. And my score was this, and you read, these are things you can do right now to start show better. And then I invite people who buy the book to do a discovery call with me so we can talk about their store and talk about things they can implement, and do. So they're not feeling burned out. Because no one wants to feel hopeless and unmotivated. And all those other things, you want to build joy. Even if you're tired from a long day, you want to be able to have hope that tomorrow is better. But when you're in burnout, you don't have that, you know that tomorrow's is gonna suck just as much as today that that's how you feel. So anyway, just throw that out there. It's at an introductory price of $8. It's a great resource to have, but even if you're not stressed right now, you kind of have it there and a PDF, and you're like, oh my goodness, I'm feeling overwhelmed. Let me see if it's just normal stress or if if something else is happening so and what I did is I created a quiz when I was still teaching, and I scored really, really high and I retook it last year, and my score was much lower. And I was in a normal stress range. So it's not just because I created the quiz, it was like, Wow, look at all these things that have improved in the last year. So,
and I love I'm definitely a fan of getting those snapshots so that we can see where we're coming from where we're moving ourselves to, and it can be for the better, maybe for the worse. And sometimes seasonally, it gets worse. Certainly, if you live up north, you know, that can have an impact the seasons of family of work, everything adds up. But I love that, that you have already been able to reflect and see a shift. And, and to I think it's a terrific resource. Because just like you say, when you're in the weeds, you don't know what to do for yourself. So what a gift to be able to just take a look and say, oh, that does sound really good. I could do that for myself right now. That's an easy shift that I can make. Because I was talking with a mother and she said, Oh, yeah, self care, that's great. When I get home from my late night shift, I've got everything done in the house, I sit down with five minutes to me, I'm supposed to think of something to do for myself to make myself feel better, like no, the brain is done, I'm spent, I can't, I don't have those resources. So I love tools like this that helped to bridge that gap. So you can find relief without being hard on ourselves. Like I can't think of anything, I guess I write again, that comparison game can't even manage help.
And I tried to talk about self care is not massage is a bubble bath. Like there's so many things like I was doing word searches before bed because it relaxes my brain. And I get so focused on finding words that I'm not thinking about whatever worried me during the day, or like with my son moving out, that's a worry on my heart like daily right now. And so I do word searches before bed. My brain is so focused on finding words, there's something about the other stuff, and then I go to bed. So maybe my subconscious may still dream about it or something. But that's self care like that simple. I didn't go get a massage or bubble bath, or you know, anything like that. I'm just doing a word searches because I found something that relaxes me and brings me joy. And that's what self care is.
Yes, it's that simple. And it's powerful too, because so many people when we're stressed out, we have a hard time falling asleep, we can't turn off the mental chatter. We try to unwind in front of the television, and then the blue light is getting our circadian rhythms out of whack. The content of the media is not really calming us down. So there's like so many sneaky fabulous ways that that little, you know, that activity that you landed on is perfect.
And I have a book I'm not doing it on a electronic device. Yes, you can. But looking at that light before bed is no good. And I took my phone out of my bedroom three years ago, it's in another room. And that has been one of the best things I've ever done.
So here's to that I'm still working on that. I put it in a drawer and pretend like that's a healthy distance. But yes, getting the phone away from the bed can have a huge impact, especially when you're stressed. If you're worn out if you're not feeling well, when our immunity is low, those electromagnetic frequencies have a greater impact on us. So don't underestimate the benefit of just putting the phone in another room, go old school and get an alarm clock.
Oh yeah, that's what I did. And then my parents have had my partner's phone number so that there's an emergency but they're also with iPhone their favorites. And so what they call when my Do Not Disturb is on it's going to go through and if my phone's ringing in the night in a room that's right next to my room. I know okay to the My son, which right now he's in the house, but when he's at his either my son or it's my parents. So I'm going to get we're going to get up an answer that because there's a reason my phone is ringing because I'm on Do Not Disturb. So I'm a big game changer. And I'm not looking at social media right before bed and making comparisons. Like we were talking about finding something. Yeah. So seeing all goes together,
together. Now I don't want to lose the opportunity to talk about one of your regular events that I have have the lovely luck to join you in. You have terrific little creativity workshops. So why do you think that creativity is important?
Okay, so just a small piece of background, I have a master's degree in early childhood and child development. And so I know with young children, activating the other side of the brain, the right side of our brain, puts us in a good puts children you know, that's how they learn. That's what they're doing. So as we grow up, we tend to stay in our logical brain. And we tend to do things that are not as creative. And so by taking time to activate that other side of the brain, you become a better problem solver. critical thinker, you become, alright, you just have fun and relax, it doesn't relax you so you can't focus because people got creative, you know, and I'm like, No, you don't have to be creative, do this stuff. Because by doing something new, you are being creative, number one, number two, it's all about process. And when you're in the process of writing up, almost writing, like a little blog post. So when you're so you guys get a sneak peek at this, when you're in the process of creating, you're not too worried about, like I was talking about the word searches, you're not worried about whatever problems, you're dealing with this, we're all dealing with something every day, whether we got to find a solution for something at work, whether Oh, my kid got trouble at school, whatever it is, I had a disagreement with my spouse, and you know, whatever it is, but when you're in the process of creating, you're not focused on that you're focused on the process, but what your subconscious mind is doing, they may still be working on the problem. And so then you may come up with a solution without even trying to come up with a solution. Because you're going to create a space, and you're in that other side of your brain. So that was a long answer to your question. But that is why creativity, like I'm such a nerd with research, and I love brain research. But that is why creativity is a great way to practice self care.
Hmm, yeah, the unintended benefits of creativity just go on and on. You know, when we move into that other way of thinking, you know, we can pull ourselves out of that stress response, because our focus is so narrow when we are stressed. And we are stressed by the notifications by our schedule by the demands on us by what how are the finances, right? I mean, that list is endless. So by making time to play to get creative, we help to pull ourselves out of that. I call it the hamster wheel, we get on a hamster wheel, and we can't get ourselves off of it, you know, we just get ourselves all spiraled up. So it's powerful. And I love joining you in these little workshops that you host every month, because it's always different. So if one thing doesn't appeal to you, next month could be completely different. And if you love it, you can keep on playing in that little genre, or medium or with that theme.
Right? And so I try to come up with different things. So like in August, late August, yes, August, we're doing like collage, we're, we're cutting out paper. And we're gonna manipulate it on a thing of another paper and like glue it down like little pieces of paper. And when I talk about color wheel, and complimentary colors, and all that, and then we're gonna do some kind of watercolor I think in September, so see, it's something totally different. And, and you always get this piece of art, it really doesn't matter what it looks like when it's done, because you've got to enjoy the process. And what I do, and this is not like, oh, let's make art, I always bring in something deeper as a coach that we're going to look at, you know that from, from attending. So it's like, like November we're doing gratitude collages. And so we're gonna really dive deep into what are we thankful for? And, like, let's not just do surface level, let's really look in and look at different areas of our lives. And what are we thankful for in these different areas, you know, so And now let's make a collage about it. Because you can hang it on your wall behind you, or in front of you. That's usually I usually face that wall, but you can hang it up. So it's like that visual reminder. I love having visuals, I need visuals for everything. And so like making the art is also serves as a good visual.
Exactly, exactly the experience creating it, the the lasting project that you have, if you love it, and if you don't, you don't have to keep it to a level things go. Yeah, yeah. But what I find too, is I also go back to that space that I was in when I was creating it, you know, remembering the conversation, or the aha moments, you know, those things that we got to topics to explore as we're creating together. You know, we like back in the day, the ladies get together and have their quilting bee right, or their coffee group or their book clubs and book clubs are coming back again. But you know, and it's terrific on many levels. And so that's why I love that opportunity that you've created for folks to come together.
It's a good way to set aside two hours to do something for you and to do something a little different. And just to try something out and just be in the process live in the present moment of the process. And like you said, you don't like it, you recycle it thrown out. Whatever you're gonna do with it. Give it to your kid and tell them to hang it up in the dorm room.
Put it up and make a collage out of it
next month. Yes, anything? Yeah, there's so many. So it's just so just to focus on that process to be in that space. And to be in a community of women, we need community community is so especially we saw that after this last, whatever 1516 months, like, I couldn't believe how much I miss community and being around people. So being able to create that on zoom has been wonderful, that we can chat. And then we all have even though not everyone knows each other. We have some things in common just by chatting and we're able to talk about things and this is wonderful,
then you get that community. Yes. Yeah. And it's so important that's one of my passions, too is helping, helping to re engage and come back together and community because we are all connected and this illusion of separation can be so painful. emotionally and it you know, can in my point of view grow into disease right as stress grows up so community is hugely important in lowering stress. And I mean as women we need to talk things out that's one of my friends always says you know, you have to say it so that as it's coming out of your mouth, you're like, Yes, that's right, or Nope, that's not right, I need to keep working on that. Right. So it's all about processing as well as supporting each other to
very much so very much so so I'm glad I have a crazy space for people where there's community and where we have fun. And so it's called the creative sparks and there's a new one every month and on the website I always keep six months at a time so you can see what's coming up.
You can plan ahead save the Dave can
and you can bundle and like save some money to
Marge
yeah you can get a bundle of three months and save $15
yeah I love it I thank you for sharing these awesome resources. Obviously the creative spark sessions are super exciting. And if y'all come and join you might see me there and I love that you've created this resource and it's such a bargain to have something that you can take your snapshot see where you are now look at some resources that will support you come back to it as you need it you know or when you don't need it just to see how you're doing compared to where you've been coming from rifle
and you can see your own progress and then I'm always there to support you. If you you know my contact information is there so you can reach out to me and be like oh my goodness, I scored an 88 What am I gonna do because it's on a scale of one to 100 and the higher your number the more burned out you are. And I'm like breed and we're gonna come up with a plan. So yes,
yes, Kimberly is super available and a phenomenal listener, a terrific guide. Pretty awesome cheerleader.
I love to hear because I love seeing people reach their goals it's so like it's so exciting. Yes,
it is it is and we deserve more cheerleaders in our lives.
Yes I agree. Less judgement more cheering
I'm gonna make that a chair. Yeah. Is there anything else you'd like to share that I didn't give you a chance to circle around to I
don't think so we talked about so much I well I guess I just want people know I do see clients one on one so I have the monthly but just so you know you can reach out to me we could talk more about that if you want to know more about it. Um, so I do see clients one to one and I'm just like excited to get on here and have this conversation we talked about so many things genetics and women and stress and burnout and creativity like this was so much fun.
Thank you well and I think it's important to I love to spotlight people who are doing brilliant things and you know personality is so important when you're looking for somebody to support you. So if you caught this episode if this speaks to you, if it resonates if Kimberly lights you up, how does she not? Then there's ways to get in touch. The website link is gonna be in the show notes super available and Kimberly's always available to well you know, within healthy limits.
Yes to serve and support. I am here with boundaries
now. We're all work in progress, aren't we?
We are we don't have it all figured out and that's okay. But if we're if we're moving forward in the right direction that's going to serve us then we're doing fabulous.
We are fabulous. Thank you my love for joining me today. It's been such a treat
Thank you so much.
Take care of yourself.
You too.